Sunday, January 29, 2012
obliteratedheart:

Guys, let me tell you about orcas.
Orca whales are mean motherfuckers. They cruise the oceans with only two things in mind: one, having sex, and two, eating every poor fuck they find out there that’s smaller than them. They are such badass motherfuckers that even great white motherfucking sharks don’t dare fuck with them, which in my books, places them above the sperm whale as Biggest Badass of the Ocean. And why don’t sharks bother them, you may wonder? Because orcas fucking learned that if you flip a shark over they go into a sort of coma, so now they do it intentionally so they can eat the motherfucking sharks. Not only that, but orcas have also learned how to hunt sperm whales and motherfucking sea birds.
The orca whale lives in a matriarchal pod. Every pod has unique hunting methods and whatnot, which is passed down from parent to offspring- these scary fuckers have formed civilizations. And what do they do for fun, apart from hopping around on the water’s surface and grinning like crazy mofos? They hunt for fun, going so far as to tip over ice floes and beach themselves just for the thrill of killing.
Now, I know what you’re thinking. Orca whales are too damn cute and smiley looking to be heartless predators of the sea. Well, let me counter-argue with this photo:

THOSE ARE NOT THE TEETH OF A CREATURE THAT WANTS TO BE YOUR FRIEND.

obliteratedheart:

Guys, let me tell you about orcas.

Orca whales are mean motherfuckers. They cruise the oceans with only two things in mind: one, having sex, and two, eating every poor fuck they find out there that’s smaller than them. They are such badass motherfuckers that even great white motherfucking sharks don’t dare fuck with them, which in my books, places them above the sperm whale as Biggest Badass of the Ocean. And why don’t sharks bother them, you may wonder? Because orcas fucking learned that if you flip a shark over they go into a sort of coma, so now they do it intentionally so they can eat the motherfucking sharks. Not only that, but orcas have also learned how to hunt sperm whales and motherfucking sea birds.

The orca whale lives in a matriarchal pod. Every pod has unique hunting methods and whatnot, which is passed down from parent to offspring- these scary fuckers have formed civilizations. And what do they do for fun, apart from hopping around on the water’s surface and grinning like crazy mofos? They hunt for fun, going so far as to tip over ice floes and beach themselves just for the thrill of killing.

Now, I know what you’re thinking. Orca whales are too damn cute and smiley looking to be heartless predators of the sea. Well, let me counter-argue with this photo:

THOSE ARE NOT THE TEETH OF A CREATURE THAT WANTS TO BE YOUR FRIEND.

Notes

  1. khittyhawk reblogged this from lesserjoke
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  6. 50-50gifs reblogged this from 10knotes
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  15. thehiddenspirit reblogged this from akeli
  16. papillonamour reblogged this from thegatefloods
  17. chikudacho reblogged this from yourenotme
  18. thegatefloods reblogged this from tinyhaleysheep and added:
    I wish biology was taught like this… SOOOO much more interesting LOL :)
  19. may-28th reblogged this from 10knotes
  20. tinyhaleysheep reblogged this from dinopicture and added:
    I TOLD EVERYONE THEY WERE CRUEL JERKS. BUT NOOO! “Haley! They’re so beautiful and wonderful!” WHO IS LAUGHING NOW?
  21. meisterdon reblogged this from asdfghjklmary
  22. asdfghjklmary reblogged this from yourenotme
  23. yourenotme reblogged this from jorgieboy and added:
    ive seen this XD yeah, true story.
  24. arr-rated reblogged this from jorgieboy
  25. jorgieboy reblogged this from caribom
  26. collegethenlife reblogged this from supaslim and added:
    FUCK WITH ORCAS.
  27. cocollage reblogged this from huffleluffagus
  28. thebaddragon reblogged this from roslindi
  29. thehappyfangirl reblogged this from dietpunkfics and added:
    Orcas are pretty amazing.
  30. dietpunkfics reblogged this from roslindi and added:
    And that’s why you don’t fuck with the motherfucking orcas.
  31. roslindi reblogged this from novembre
  32. capnsyd reblogged this from starsapphira